Well. I made it safe and sound....well.. not necessarily sound. I'm going to be honest. This isn't fun. I imagined my first post in this great city to be about how amazing everything is and how I never want to come home and how I am overjoyed to be here...it's pretty much opposite. And I almost wanted to lie and say that it was great so I could have a cool adventure. But here I am confessing that I'm A of all: a big baby who apparently isn't as independent as she thought, B of all: THAT girl that misses her boyfriend after only being gone one day (I guess I really like this kid).
I don't know why I thought I was more independent than I really am. I'm actually really insecure on my own and need people around me to support me and encourage me. I can't do this on my own! (and thank the Lord for that cause you know i'd mess it up if i tried). But I need way more than just the help of friends- I need the Lord to give me strength to be brave in a new situation and find the good in things. I so often forget about Him. Because I am so often consumed with other things that I place above Him. Encouragement from people close to me is great, but I can't rely fully on them to tell me to snap out of it and get a grip. The Lord reminds me that all the time- I just tend to push Him aside.
Whew. Breathe amy. There. That was my complaint/rant from day 1. It was hard. I cried, not gonna lie. But...I'm alive. And i haven't thrown up. And I haven't gotten on a plane to come home(tempting). I can do this. The Lord can help me do this.
Currently I am sitting in a yellow towel on my bed waiting for the shower to get warm. Though it probably never will. Mi mama just keeps saying "Yo no se...quizas esta roto?" (I don't know...maybe it's broken?). Ha. So we'll see if i get a shower tonight.
Now, let's here some positives:
-My host mom is the sweetest, though she doesn't speak a lick of English
-I ate a really really weird meat tonight( and y'all know how I am about meat) and didn't puke.
-I toured the city (in the rain..) and got a really good intro to what life is like here.
-sat in on a quincenera while we were waiting for the rain to pass. ha. I was the only one there who didn't cross my chest and face in a catholic manner.
- the shower eventually got warm by the way-such a blessing.
-I ended the night by reading "To Kill a Mocking Bird". My house mom brought me tea por mi estomago. She said it would make me feel better :)
-I talked with Allysha the director about my lonesome-ness and we are meeting tomorrow to try and work something out.
Today ended well. It was a rough start but God is getting me through it. Prayers would be greatly appreciated!! Tomorrow (sunday) we have a free day and then we start classes monday morning!
Love and Tortillas, (Ruth Minor- the ever so sweet positive influence in my life told me that tortillas is less offensive, and probablly more true, than tequila.)
Amy
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You are so great Ames. I am praying for you and know that God has a plan for you and your time there! Love you, Alli
ReplyDeleteP.S. Your blog is so cute! I want to live in it :)
ReplyDeleteSHMAMY-
ReplyDeletejust prayed. you're great. this just means God's gonna do REALLY huge things :) love you dear! post often!
you'll be fine! no worries..you are on a big adventure and the Lord has so many great things in store for you to learn. miss you co!
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